So here I am, following orders, creeping on some blondie, trying to scare the living hell out of her and all of a sudden, someone's hand covers my mouth, and someone's arms grab me by the shoulders and drag my ass into a nearby building.
At first I thought it was some sort of trap, but it was only my fellow Proxies, Gabe and White (Not their real names) they hated me, ever since I moved into the neighborhood, you see, I don't exactly "Respect" our Master, they say the only reason I work with them, is so that I can survive for a bit longer (Which is true). They don't like that kind of thing, so they knee me in the gut and start beating the ever lasting crap out of me.
Gladly, they didn't beat me up to the point where I lost consciousness, still, they gave me one heck of a beating. So yeah, this is the kind of shit I have to work with, they don't dare approach Claude, since he would probably knock both of them the fuck out, they can't approach Alesa, since she's mostly always inside the house, nor are they willing to approach Franky, the whole neighborhood is afraid of him anyway.
To be honest, I think they single me out, simply because I'm such an asshole, which kind of makes me smile. So I'm stuck inside the house for a while, grabbing a couple of Z's, while Claude is going to be taking over the duties for a while, since he missed a good bit of them and I had to cover for his ass.
Not the first time I got the shit kicked out of me, by fellow "co-workers", there was plenty of times before, but meh, never really gave it that much of a thought, I mean you always get bullied, some people hide, some people fight back, I just lay there, I dunno if I could beat Gabe and White if I tried, but at the end of the day, I just don't give much of a shit about it.
Sleepy time.
Blud, you know what to do now, right? You need to dry dock their toilets. Then they'll be too busy cleaning up your shit to bother you.
ReplyDeleteAlthough, bear this in mind Maluț, from my experience as a runner, I recall a time when two drunk guys pissed on my trainers and then started kicking me, I didn't do anything and then they started trying to steal my trousers, so I stabbed one in the foot with a scalpel. What I mean is, it started off with them pissing on my shoes and then it escalated, you need to address it early on or it will escalate. The worst case scenario can always happen. So make sure it doesn't.
Is there really so much in-fighting? Christ, you proxies couldn't organise a piss-up in a brewery....
The fuck is Malut?
DeleteAnd why do you care?
If there is a moment where they try to end my life, of course I'm gonna fight back, but if they want to just beat me up in order to inflate their ego's, let them, I can walk off a few bruises, no biggie.
I dunno, I never was part of a bigger picture and the only in-fighting going on in this neighborhood, is Gabe and White trying to jump my ass every chance they get.
Since you asked so nicely - *Maluț, not "Malut", is just a nickname; taking off a the stressed syllable of someone's name and adding "-uț" (or -uța / -utza for girls, or just -ța) just a way to say someone's name casually in Romanian which is my mamas language. Nothing to be concerned about; if I wanted to insult you, I wouldn't hide it behind any language. Сукин сын.
DeleteIf they're beating the shit out of you, they've got the upper hand already; you don't know when the game might change. Ultimately you're the judge of the situation and that's the way it's gotta stay, but get out of there if you even suspect it might get out of your control, always always always make sure you have at least some control.
As for why I care, Alesana asked that, and I didn't want to talk about it. In case that didn't get through to you, I guess it bears clarifying: I don't want to talk about it. You comment on my blog, but I never ask you why you care, in fact you gave Lyle a real shouting down but I never asked you why you cared what happened to me, what do you give a shit that Kyrylo did that to some stupid runner?
Fuck, all this "I don't give a fuck, but I do" is making my head spin. Is there something wrong with you, or with me, or with both of us?
There's "Something" wrong with everyone involved in this. Some are just less fucked up, than the others.
DeleteListen, I gave him a shouting, because I fucking despise rapists, FUCKING DESPISE THEM. If I had the power, I'd castrate all of these motherfuckers, not kill them, because killing them would be too merciful. Or better yet, create Rapists, which rape, only rapists, go all Hunger Games up in their shit.
You're right, you are a stupid runner and I'm a stupid proxy, to you. But that doesn't mean, that I can't feel bad for a rape victim. I had a good friend who was raped, it fucking devastated her, shortly, she committed suicide, hung her own ass off the ceiling.
So yeah, maybe I do feel a little sympathetic towards you, but don't stretch it, if you die, I won't sob, cause I simply don't know you and thus don't give much of a damn.
Clear?
You know, you could always tell me that they keep jumping your ass, all you need to do is give the word and I'll go beat their asses.
DeleteAnd look at you, you big softy.
Eat a dick, ass face.
DeleteI would love to have your vehemence when it comes to dealing with those fucks, but frankly, I've never admitted this before, but Kyrylo and his friends left me feeling not human. Something below human. A lump of flesh. Maybe not even that. A hollow doll. I dunno, sometimes it feels like there is no blood to bleed, sometimes it feels like there is just nothing left of me. Just a doll, a disposable little doll. Get treated like nothing, and you end up feeling like nothing, have you ever felt so numb it makes your head hurt?
DeleteSo you'll understand if I'm sceptical of you having even the tiniest bit of sympathy for me when I am nothing. I've just never known proxies who even remotely give a shit about what happened with Kyrylo; the nightmares and flashbacks and panic attacks, they don't want to know. Hell, even my father was a Runner and he did not care, in fact he was the one to rent me out like property in the first place.
Well that is probably the biggest pile of shit I ever heard.
DeleteI've been following your blog for a while and I know for a fact you're wrong.
Wrong about what?
DeleteSanna: is that what you thought of the Wolf after Carmine raped her? That he made her into a fucking nothing doll?? If you didn't then don't spew that shit about yourself! If you did- If you did then fuck you for all the power you're giving them
DeleteNo, that's not what I thought of her at all! I couldn't think that way about anyone. I always admired her and sort of looked up to her in a way, despite her being a proxy, maybe it was the shared appreciation of Italian horror movies. This applies before and after, she was no less strong and amazing to me, actually I think she was stronger, to survive something like that.
DeleteWell if you wouldn't think that way about anyone, then why in the holy mother of fuck would you do it to yourself?
DeleteTake what you just said about the Wolf and apply it to you. I know that's what she would say. She must have thought more of you than that, because she fucking nicknamed you
Well isn't this whole drama sweet.
DeleteSomebody hand me a bucket, I'm about to puke.
I think its rather sweet that both you and Fell try to help Sanna realize something about herself.
DeleteI'm sorry. It's not my intention to make anyone feel uncomfortable or sick.
DeleteSanna: Stop fucking apologizing and read what the fuck I just said.
DeleteAlesana: It's what the Wolf would do. Besides, if you let fuckers like that make you feel subhuman, then you're giving them what they want.
Malik: Well aren't you just a fucking edgy little shit.